Wisdom of Sindh – Page Five

It is so easy  to criticize others. Why? Because we are not in their shoes. One cannot argue the fact that only the person who is in the situation is aware of why he/she behaves the way he/she does. Hence the observation:

Gur jaaney, Gur jee gothree jaaney

Which literally means that the jaggery knows, and the bag that carries the jaggery knows (how light or heavy, how empty or full, or how clean or dirty the contents and/or the bag are).

Sindhis urged their fellow brethren to be good. They claimed that there were various benefits to derive from being exemplary. They stated:

Thado gharo paan khey paaneyee chhaaon mein vyaarey

Which means that a cool pot of water seats itself in the shade.  It implies that if one stays composed one stays out of conflict.  To stay out of conflict, one has to sometimes kow-tow or bow down to a fool to benefit there-from. Hence the Sindhis stated:

Pahanjey gatee, Pau gaday khey perey

Which literally means that for ones benefit, one sometimes should pamper a donkey (a fool).

Another method of remaining peaceful is not to be distressed, when one possesses less, and not be proud when one has much. Thus:

Thoro disee araao na thijey,  Ghano disee sarao na thijey

Sindhis believed that one should live according to ones means. Hence they observed:

Savar aahir per digheran

Which means that one should stretch ones legs according to ones blanket.

It is believed that if your right hand does a good deed, your left hand should not get to know about it.  On this creed, Sindhis opined:

Nekee karey daryaa mein vijh

Which literally means that after having performed a good deed, drop the thought of it into the sea.

There are  people, who do nothing but exaggerate. Sindhis said that such people convert a rope into a snake. In Sindhi, they stated:

Noree maan naang karan

For people who exaggerate, Sindhis said:

Jabal khey thyaa soora jaayee kuyee

Which literally means that the mountain had labor pains, but only a mouse took birth.  Similarly:

Kuey ladhee haid garee,  Chavey aaon pasaaree

Which literally means that a mouse found a piece of turmeric, and claims to own a  grocery store.

About people who paint an exaggerated image about themselves, Sindhis claimed:

Labhey lath na,  Babo bandookan vaaro

Which means that he is a type of person who does not even own a stick, and he claims to be a master of guns. 

 In matters of relationships, Sindhis made interesting observations.

For a husband they believed that:

Murs ta phado,  Na ta jado

Which literally means that unless a husband is hard to please, he is not good enough.

Probably  the macho image of a difficult man was attractive to a Sindhi woman. On the other hand, maybe the proverb was coined by the parents of the girl to make her life more satisfactory, by praising the negative traits of her husband.

In the following proverb however, they categorically compare a son-in-law to a crooked stick. Sindhis state:

Naathee dingee kaathee

Present time Sindhis would probably disagree with the above observation, as one often sees sons-in law as caring as ones sons and daughters.

During the time that our fore-fathers lived their life in Sindh, daughters must have been a life long liability, hence Sindhis stated:

Abo gasey dheeya vasey

Which literally means that fathers have to work very hard so that their daughters prosper.

It is interesting to observe how much the daughter’s parents would give in for the happiness of their female off-spring.

The following proverb was probably coined by dejected girls’ parents who would not reciprocate the humiliation inflicted upon them by the in-laws of their daughter. They stated:

Jainkhey dinyoon jaayoon,  Tinsaan kahryoon baayoon

Which means that once one has given ones daughters in marriage, one cannot get angry with her new family.

The previous two proverbs point to the fact that having  daughters put one through difficulties and humiliation at the time when these sayings were coined. However it is interesting to note that the Sindhis of yore believed that a son shares you properties and possessions whereas a daughter partakes of your joys and sorrows. Hence Sindhis stated:

Putu thyey maal bhai, Dheeya thyey haal bhai

Sindhis stated:

Maau jee dil makhan, Puta jee dil pathar

Which literally means that a mother’s heart is soft as butter while the heart of the son is made of stone.

 Elders claimed that  though a mother-in-law be hard as wood , she is  good to have around, as during times of need she would always be there to extend a helping hand. Hence they stated:

Sas  kaath jee bi suthee

About a daughter in law, Sindhis believed:

Nayee kwaanr nava deenha,  Chhikey taaney daha deenha

Which literally means that a bride remains a new bride for 9 days, and at the most for 10 days. This proverb probably means that a bride gets to rest for 9 days after which she starts her domestic duties.

The mother-in-law of those days, resented the relationship her daughter-in-law had with her own family.  Hence there is the saying:

Vethee huyee ruthee,  Mathaan aayus peko maanoo

Which literally means: She was sitting annoyed and upset, and to make it worse, came someone to visit from her family.

Yet strangely, to contradict the above, the following saying states that the in-laws of ones off-spring, are as dear to one, as ones own eye pupils. Thus Sindhis stated:

Sena akhyun jaa nena

About the grand children from the daughter’s side, Sindhis claimed:

Doita vadhandey very

Which implies that the children from ones daughter were never close enough to their maternal grand-parents, however much the latter pampered the kids.

This was probably due to the fact that children spent more time with their paternal grand-parents, and hence were influenced by the their opinion, of their maternal grand-parents.  It is interesting to note that this proverb does not generally ring true now-a-days, probably because grand-children spend enough time with their maternal grand-parents and formulate their own beliefs.

Maternal grand-parents claimed:

Naani radhan vaaree,  Doitaa khaain vaaraa

Which literally means that maternal grand-children eat while the grand-mother toils and cooks.

Grand-parents believed that:

Moor khaan vyaaj mitho

Which means that the interest is always more enjoyable than the principal amount, thereby implying that one tends to love ones grand-children more than their parents.

Talking about interest accrued from wealth Sindhis observed that interest “runs” which implies that it augments even during the night. Thus they stated:

Vyaaj raat jo bhee pandh karey

About interest they also claimed:

Vyaaj aahey Soortee ghoro

Which means that interest is like a racing horse.

On the subject of debts Sindhis observed:

Karz vado marz

Which means that owing debts is like suffering from a bad disease.

However whatever one is able to salvage from a bad debt is good. Hence if a ship drowns, salvage the iron. The latter is what is expressed in the following proverb:

Budyal beri maan,  Loh bhee chango

Sindhis believed that:

Jeko daadho so gaabo

Which means that he who stands his ground, eventually wins.

Yet during arguments and discussions, Sindhis wisely observed that:

Taari hik hathee kon vajandee aahey

Which literally means that one cannot clap with one hand . It implies that wherever there is an argument, all parties are probably to blame to a certain extent.

The following proverb states that:

Jeko chul tey,  So dil tey

Which means that one is always more fond of those members of ones family with who one lives and eats together.

The following proverb did not contend with the last saying’s belief because Sindhis claimed:

Deraanyoon veraanyoon,  satan janman khaan viryal

Which means that sister’s in -law (wives of brothers), continue to remain enemies since the last seven generations even though they probably stayed and ate together.

Maybe the reason for the arguments and quarrels was the the fickle mind of the woman. For such females, Sindhis claimed:

Charee jo chooro,  Kadheen tanga mein,  Kadheen baanh mein

Which literally means that a crazy woman wears a bangle, sometimes on her wrist and sometimes on her leg. This proverbs is pointing to the fickle nature of an unstable woman.

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